The last month or so has been quite the ride. Finished my last education class, painted my last graded painting, lost my job, got half the job back, ended up working a few full-time weeks with a bunch of exuberant and testing kids. Learned a lot about myself. Got a nasty illness. Ordered a book called "Setting Limits in the Classroom," and started following through and giving out a lot more consequences and started having a lot more fun.
Even though I am looking down the barrel of July and a move to Boulder in four or five weeks, it feels like summer has just started. The time feels long, but the distance feels short. Although I've worked a lot with kids over the last year or two, this has been one of my first real experience with managing an entire classroom of kids for an entire day. I've been challenged-- to say the least-- in more than a few ways.
Being in a class with a majority of boys, a majority of which are continually testing the limits, has taught me a lot about myself, my managment style and the importance of consistency and follow through. I feel like most of my headspace is occupied by questions about how to get these kids to simply do what I say. Figuring out how to keep a simple "pick up the trash around you" or "stop whapping your neighbor with that towel" from turning into an epic battle. Luckily, I have the privalege of being on a team of people all working towards the goal, but teaching children to follow my directions is still an individual project always at work.
Working with these kids this summer has been a big reminder of how broken people are and how much it takes to gain the trust of many children who have already spent the 8 or 9 years of thier short lives in environments that teach them that the words of others are not neccessarily safe. It has challenged me to remain continually cognizant of each word I say, how I say it, and the actions that follow my words.
These last few weeks, each day has been a reminder about how much I love working with kids. The thing I love about teaching is that there is such a strong connection to the creative process in it. you must be innovative in the way that you use your words, actions, and classtime to form these young people into the beauties they were made to be. You are part of creating so many lives-- and yet that seems so beyond your own honor. Who picked me for this co-creation, anyway?
So, I am learning how to refine my words, my actions, my expectations. The way that I love each of these kids changes as I learn more about what they really need and how I can provide that. Even this week as I've really tightened up my management in terms of word and action, rather than feeling like a tyrant, I've felt more free to really focus on building relationships and having fun with these kids. And I've even recieved a few compliments about how great of a teacher I am.
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